I have truly met my match. Her name is Haven Barker.
I honestly do not know what the future holds but I do know that Haven Barker will get.the.job.done.
Happy birthday to my sweet Haven Elizabeth. She turns 4 years old May 24th and I cannot believe how fast the time has flown by! This little pistol is as much of a joy as she is a pain, and of course I mean that lovingly! Well, mostly lovingly....Haven is hands-down, THE most strong-willed child I have ever known. Ever. And I know a LOT of people. I've seriously met my match. It's a daily battle of the wills. She is hard headed and spirited and has a will of steel. Like her mom. But oh, somehow more.
Let's put it this way: my daily prayer for Haven is that the Lord "breaks her will but not her spirit" and let me explain.
I want Haven to have determination. I want her to have a severe passion for what she believes in, so much so that she never ever backs down from it. I want her to be so self-disciplined that no one can talk her out of following the dreams she has her heart set on making come true. I do want these things for my child and I believe her strong-willed personality will allow her to do these things and so much more! What I mean when I want the Lord to 'break her will' is that I want her to submit to authority: mine and her father's of course, but more importantly her heavenly Father's authority. I want her to have such a fierce passion for the ways of the Lord that she never backs down from a challenge of her faith. I want her to believe so strongly in the TRUTH of the Gospel that she wins hundreds of people to Christ and that she makes an impact on this world and for eternity!
I believe she can.
The Lord made Haven the way she is and its my job to help mold her to be a submissive child, and ultimately a submissive wife and submissive Christian woman. Its my job to train her in the way she should go. Its my job to be the example of the Proverbs 31 woman she should be come.
I doubt myself every day.
What a huge task that is so difficult at times! Especially when we are butting heads in Hobby Lobby and all the other shoppers and employees are staring at me with Stone tucked in his sling and Micah obediently pushing the shopping cart treading lightly not to make me even more mad and I am literally dragging my middle child through the store while she is screaming "OW OW OW MOM YOU'RE HURTING MY ARM!! OW OW OW!!!!!!!!!!!!" and the poor woman cutting the fabric is almost afraid to wait on me because she fears that she too, will be subject to my uncontrollable wrath and temper that inevitably causes me to spank my child in a public place while still wearing my baby on my chest and still managing to shop (because I am a multi-tasker after all and by golly I am BUYING my stinkin' fabric) and still somehow I am managing to pick up the GIANT rolls of fabric that said middle child has managed to knock down off of the racks and are now unraveling across the Hobby Lobby aisles while I chase after them in my 4 inch wedge heels...
but I digress...
I know that days like today will be a part of the stepping stones that form Haven into the spirited young lady she will one day become. I know that when she doesn't have a nap that she is more irritable and that it was my choice to leave the house at naptime to run errands and take all 3 kids to Stone's 9 month check up. I know that when Haven is a teenager that I will long for the days I could drag her by her arm through a Hobby Lobby. But I will not give up. I will continue to try my best to train my strong-willed child and help her to become strong-willed for the Lord. I will pray every day that God leads me in the right direction regarding the precious gift He has entrusted me in Haven Elizabeth.
And I will never ever give up or back down. I learned that from my middle child. She too, has met her match.
Happy 4th Birthday, my sweet Haven. You bring me joy and make me laugh every single day. I love you more than you will ever know!
